“The sun never set on the British Empire, because even God couldn’t trust the Englishman in the dark.” – Shashi Tharoor
On the 16th of January, the 10th grade participated in a mock trial in Integrated Humanities class, with one side prosecuting the Imperial Crown, and the other side defending it. What ensued could only be described as chaos. Cross-examinations devolved into shouting matches, witnesses were sworn in on a copy of the IBDP global politics textbook, and prosecution and defense alike fell on the floor laughing during testimonies.
We were given roughly 1 week to find evidence and come up with witness testimonies, and create a chargesheet, none of which we did until the night before. Here were some of our charges against the empire: complicity in human rights violations, exploitation of resources, cultural erasure, and violent suppression of dissent, not to forget hauling every foreign rock back to the British museum. Then, the lead lawyers gave opening statements, called witnesses to the stand, and the proceedings began.
Perhaps the most memorable moment of the entire trial was when a student representing plantation owner William Beckford committed perjury in a last-ditch attempt to defend themselves. They said: “Hey look, I didn’t own that many slaves.” When the judge themselves is laughing at a testimony, you know the courtroom is in for a ride. Mr. Piyush’s main question was probably: what evidence should be considered admissible? This was certainly a debacle, as we pulled from sources ranging from 200 year old oil-paintings, to Dalrymple’s “The Anarchy”, to the newest NCERT Civics textbook.
This is not to say that we didn’t bring up valid points; on both sides, strong arguments and rebuttals were made. When the defense brought up Britain educating Indians in science and technology, the prosecution brought up the Gurukul system and Aryabhata. When the prosecution brought up oppressive policies, the defense talked about the abolition of Sati and the caste system. India, the British West Indies, the Caribbean, Northern Africa, the middle east, and even the Chinese opium war. The impacts of British Colonialism on all these were discussed. It’s not like the arguments weren’t there, it’s just that they were mostly referential to the Byju’s website.
The student playing David Livingstone, when confronted with a reliable source stating he owned upwards of 10,000 slaves, rebutted this claim, saying: “No, no, no, I had 10,000 friends”. It’s safe to say the judge ruled in the prosecution’s favor. There are perhaps two important takeaways from this trial: 1) The British empire orchestrated the systematic colonization and exploitation of a fifth of the world’s countries under the guise of “civilizing” missions, and 2) Never trust 10th graders to represent you in court. It doesn’t matter what side they are on, for even if they are on both sides, they will still lose.